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Preston pulled back. “I’ll also check there’s a locked door to the street and a security guard in the lobby. If there isn’t one, Az will hire one.”
Oh. That was what they had been talking about. Security. Safety for when he was alone in the big bad city. “I know.” He pulled free of Preston’s grip and leaned on the porch rail. “You both seem to think Cal is going to go on a murderous rampage or something.”
“Is he?”
“He’s volatile. Not violent.” He frowned. “I mean. Until now, he’s never done anything like what he did when he was here. I don’t know why he—”
Preston touched the green and yellow blotch on Cobalt’s neck, the remainder of the vicious love bite Cal had gifted him. “I’ve always believed he was a jerk and a useless excuse for a boyfriend. I never would have pegged him for the kind to push you down or—”
“That was an accident. The step—”
“Or”—Preston touched his lips, and he quieted—“throw a wrench through a window. I don’t know what’s changed, but something has, and Azure is right not to take chances. Please. Don’t brush off what your brother is doing. It’s as much a part of him to take these security measures as it is for you to want to try and avoid them. Be glad he isn’t slapping a bodyguard on you. He wants to.”
“He’s being ridiculous.”
“Baby, it isn’t just Cal. It’s the Winslow name, your own public profile. Everything. And honestly, you know Cal isn’t the only reason he wants you watched over.”
Cobalt flushed hot and stared at Preston, even as his words faded into the background.
“What?” Preston drew his brows down into a deep scowl. “You don’t think just being a Winslow is reason enough to have a security presence? I know you left that life behind, but the name, and everything that comes with it, is still part of you.”
So he was a Winslow and could never leave the name behind. So beside the point. Cobalt grinned. “You just called me baby.”
“I—what? No. I don’t—”
“You.” Cobalt grinned wider and poked a finger into the center of Preston’s chest. Soft in some places he might be, but his chest, wide and muscled, was certainly not. “You called me baby.” Cobalt’s heart careened into high gear, and he laughed.
Preston’s frown deepened. “I don’t think—”
“Stop it. You did.” Cobalt took a step back. “Catch!” He pushed off the creaking porch decking into the air, and Preston, reflexes admirably quick for someone so big, did catch him as he wound his long legs around Preston’s hips.
“Now kiss me.” But Cobalt didn’t wait for an answer and covered Preston’s mouth with his own, digging his fingers through Preston’s too-short hair. He couldn’t get a good grip.
Preston staggered, his back slamming into the wall next to the door. He held on to Cobalt, tilted his head into the kiss, but Cobalt’s control soon eroded, and he was whimpering into Preston’s mouth as Preston worked his tongue past Cobalt’s lips. In the next instant, the world spun and it was Cobalt pinned against the wall with his feet off the floor. Helpless under Preston’s mouth, Cobalt could only sigh into the kiss and give up the rest of his control.
When Preston did finally allow him room to breathe, he gasped and blinked and failed completely to steady his pounding heart.
Cal often—more than often, if Cobalt were honest—showed his greater strength and his desire for power in bed. Cobalt still sported the bruises to prove it. But this… there were no aching parts, no marks, no flutters of insecurity as Preston showed Cobalt his place. Cobalt stared up, panting, digging his fingers into Preston’s shoulders, at a loss for words or even thoughts.
“You going to tell me what happens next?” Preston asked, a rumbling growl underpinning his words.
“No, sir.”
Preston’s eyes widened, but the smile that curved his lips was sinful. “I would be very careful about using a title like sir around a guy like me. Especially if you’re the type to let it stick.” His eyes narrowed again, and the pale blue became a cool fire in their depths.
“I like what it does to your eyes,” Cobalt whispered.
“And I like what it does to you.” Preston moved so Cobalt could let his legs drop. His feet hit the wood planks. “I like how warm and fluttery you are.” He kissed Cobalt lightly. “Pliable.” He slipped a hand under Cobalt’s sweater.
Cobalt shied away from the touch, both because he was slick and sweaty under there and because that area was still tender from Cal’s recent visit.
“Stay still,” Preston urged, gently but firmly clamping both hands around Cobalt’s skinny waist. “His bruises can’t hurt you if you don’t try and get away from my touch.”
Cobalt stared, mouth dry, thoughts scattered.
“Now that all his crap is out of your house, I’m taking you up to your bed, and that’s where we’re staying for the rest of the day. Is that going to be a problem?”
Cobalt shook his head.
“Good.” Gentle but inexorable, Preston buried his face until his lips and teeth came into contact with the skin of Cobalt’s neck, directly over the most tender spot Cal had left on him. He dared not flinch. Preston kissed the spot sweetly, dragged his teeth over it, then lapped a light lick over the blemish, sending a shiver through Cobalt that reached his toes.
He leaned heavily on the wall, closed his eyes, and concentrated on not hyperventilating as Preston worked his way up his jaw to his earlobe. His cock jumped and he squirmed, trying to find a comfortable way to stand that didn’t give away his lack of control.
“You trust me not to hurt you? No matter what happens up there?”
If this was any indication of how it was going to be, there was no way Cobalt could resist. He’d known that would be the case, and swallowed. His cock once more twitched, and he barely held back a whine of need. “You can do what you want.”
“I need to know you’ll put the brakes on if you don’t want it.”
Cobalt blinked at him. “Want what?”
“Whatever. I don’t know your limits, so if you say stop, I’ll stop, but I can’t read your mind.”
“I just want you.”
Preston still waited, watching him closely.
Cobalt dug teeth into his bottom lip. He honestly couldn’t imagine Preston doing anything he wouldn’t want. But this was something his lover needed to hear him say, evidently, so he nodded. “I promise. I won’t let you hurt me, but I also promise I know what I like and what I want, so don’t be surprised if I only beg for more.”
“Good. Because there’s a whole lot I want to do.” Preston reached around and cupped his ass, squeezing and yanking Cobalt against him. Their erections slammed together, and Cobalt groaned. He hadn’t gotten that hard that fast in a very long time.
The bedroom was still a disaster of open dresser drawers and strewn CDs. Cobalt had been far more interested in separating everything belonging to Cal from his own things and getting it all into the boxes than preserving the exacting tidiness of his surroundings.
“You were in a hurry,” Preston observed as he swept a pile of dance gear off the foot of the bed.
“Wanted him out.” Cobalt didn’t mean to snap, but were they here to have sex, or talk about his fucked-up relationship? He blinked up at Preston.
Fucked-up ex-relationship.
“He is out, baby. For good.”
“Yeah.” He plopped onto the space Preston had cleared and dropped his hands into his lap. So much for the urgency of his erection.
With a hand on his shoulder, Preston pushed him onto his back so he could straddle him. “And I’m in. Or at least I will be in a few minutes.”
“Just like that?”
Preston’s gaze heated as he unzipped Cobalt’s plush hoodie to smooth a palm over the bared skin beneath. “You either forgot or weren’t paying attention.”
Goose bumps tingled across Cobalt’s skin, and he shifted, widening his legs until they came into contact with Preston’s. T
he connection grounded him, and he eased some tension from his back. “What do you mean?”
“For you it might be just like that.” He hunkered down over Cobalt’s torso to begin exploration with his mouth.
His kisses were warm, and Cobalt wiggled, trying to force connection where it would feel most pleasing. “Not for you?”
One of Preston’s huge hands settled on Cobalt’s hip, pushed down, and like that, Cobalt was immobilized. The forced stillness was only partly due to the physical pressure. Preston studied him as though he’d find some sign. Cobalt paused—breathing, movement, everything—and waited.
“I have been waiting for you for more years than I care to talk about, Coby.”
Cobalt stared up at him.
“I’ll wait as long as I have to. I knew the day you walked into that fiasco of a twenty-first birthday celebration your parents threw you, it wouldn’t matter who else wandered into my life. You were the one.”
“That was… so long ago.” God. Twenty years? More, even, and you’ve been waiting for me all that time. “I was a complete bitch that day.”
“You were a lost boy pretending to be a grown-up.” Preston smoothed a hand down Cobalt’s stomach. It fluttered under the touch. “A hurt kitten hissing at everyone who wanted to help.”
Cobalt held back a purr now. “All I wanted then was out of that family, and they tried so hard to make me stay.”
Preston lowered his mouth to Cobalt’s navel and kissed, tiny pecks of sensation that made Cobalt hiss with pleasure and need.
When the nibbling lips traveled south, Cobalt tried to lift his hips, which reminded him of that restraining hand. He gulped. “Was that when Az started planning his Spy on Cobalt Campaign?”
“Oh no.” Preston peered up from where his chin grazed Cobalt’s pubic hair and grinned. “It was in full swing by then. He knew you, your brother. Knew what you’d do when the lawyers tried to give you your inheritance and made sure you couldn’t burn any bridges.”
“I tried.”
Preston planted a few more solid kisses along Cobalt’s belly. “Oh, I know you did, baby. Scorched a few with your efforts, but Az had your back.”
“And you?”
Preston was back at his nipples again, and the question was a breathy one. He’d almost forgotten he’d asked it by the time Preston reached the column of his throat. Cobalt found himself gasping for air and clawing at the rapidly retreating thread of his thoughts. He didn’t want to let Preston kiss the conversation away. It was important. He pushed at Preston’s shoulders and writhed to get free of his grip.
“Stop.” Preston had his hand gripped tight and above his head in a heartbeat. “Stop,” he said again, glare cool and implacable.
Cobalt gulped hard and nodded.
“Other hand,” Preston ordered, and without clear thought that he should or shouldn’t do as he was told, Cobalt lifted his free hand over his head, where Preston grabbed it and crossed his wrists. He could hold Cobalt down with one hand that way, and the pressure of his weight on Cobalt’s hips and legs was… inescapably there.
“What about me?” Preston asked.
Cobalt had to think hard to recall the gist of the conversation. When he did, he met Preston’s avid gaze. “You. You had my back too?”
Preston smiled, and it was a bit predatory, a bit possessive. A lot protective and kind. “I drove him to every show, didn’t I?”
“He didn’t hire someone in Boston or New York? What about Winnipeg? You didn’t drive him halfway across the country. I danced there for nearly ten years.”
Preston shook his head. “Honey, you’re a Winslow. We flew places, and I drove on the ground.”
“You always went with him.”
“I wouldn’t have passed up a chance to see you dance.”
“Every show?”
“At least once.” He kissed Cobalt’s cheek. “Every opening night. Most closing nights. Some in between.”
“That’s a lot of driving.”
“I’m very good at it.”
Cobalt squirmed and Preston renewed his grip, making it tighter, more grounding.
“So you see?” He curled one side of his mouth up. “Waiting isn’t a thing for me. It’s only a matter of time, and I have as much of that as you need. If this is too fast for you—”
“No.”
Preston lifted one eyebrow—that interrupted one where the tiny hairs refused to grow over scar tissue.
Cobalt itched to run just the tip of his finger over the break. “I don’t need more time,” he assured Preston, willing his heart to slow down as he spoke. It didn’t really listen to him, and his mouth got progressively drier with each word he spoke. “I need more—” He tried to twist his hips out from under Preston’s and failed when Preston ground down more firmly. “That,” he whispered. “I need more of that.”
“Even after what Cal did?”
“Especially.” Cobalt willed him to see into his soul. “I can do all the things I need to do in a day, a week, even months and months away. I’ve done it before, and I can do it all now. I’m tough enough. I already know that. I still want to come home to a man who can pin me down and love me no matter what.”
“Cal wasn’t that guy?”
“He liked the pinning-down part. The fucking. But it wasn’t love. It was ownership, and I had no say in what he took of me and used.” His cheeks flushed hot. “It was better to let him than to fight him.” Fighting might have led to Cal taking what he wanted anyway, and that skirted the edges of consent far closer than Cobalt was comfortable admitting.
“And if I told you I had thoughts on the amount of say you get in how I use your body? Are you willing to talk about that someday?”
Cobalt swallowed hard but retained eye contact. He drew in a deep breath and lifted his chin. “You’re not Cal. You don’t have a mean or selfish bone in your body. You’ve only ever protected me as best you could. As much as I would let you. Why would that stop if I gave you more of what you’ve always wanted?”
“It doesn’t scare you?”
“Everything scares me. But I trust you.”
Preston nodded, lifted one of Cobalt’s hands, and pressed his lips to his palm. “I’m glad you said that.” He nuzzled into the crook of Cobalt’s neck, unerringly finding that most tender of spots again. He grazed teeth over bruised skin, and Cobalt shuddered.
“Glad I’m terrified of life?” He flicked his gaze to the light fixture, lids fluttering as he tried to keep them from closing.
“Glad you know it,” Preston said, kissing his collarbone. “Glad you can admit it to me.” He kissed again, traveling lower once more until he found a nipple. He had to let go of Cobalt’s hands to reach, and Cobalt splayed both over Preston’s back. “It gives us a place to start from where we can both be safe.” He nibbled lightly on Cobalt’s nipple, pinching to leave a lasting impression of his presence.
“Oh God.” Cobalt shivered and clamped a hand over the back of Preston’s head. “Fuck!” he shouted when Preston took the nipple between his teeth and pinched harder. His back arched and his hips jerked, restricted still by Preston’s weight.
A low growl emanated from Preston’s throat as he jerked his head from Cobalt’s grasp and moved on. He found the other nipple and tortured it until Cobalt was panting and swearing under his breath. His cock ached to be touched, but Preston had removed his own body, kneeling back to reach more of Cobalt’s. The position deprived Cobalt of any sensation at all on his cock, and he whimpered. He shoved at Preston’s shoulders and head, trying to get him to move lower.
“More,” he demanded, his voice running roughshod over the moment.
Peering up from his crouch, face near Cobalt’s groin, Preston grinned, a wicked, evil expression. “Given how long I waited for you, maybe I’m thinking about returning the favor.”
“Don’t you dare!” Cobalt heaved up onto his elbows to better glare at Preston.
The grin only widened.
“Prest
on…?” Cobalt choked back a frustrated sound and snarled. “I want this.”
“What, exactly?”
“You. Anything. Everything. Whatever.”
“Trust me?”
“I just said—”
Preston covered Cobalt’s mouth with his hand and captured his gaze. “Trust me.”
Cobalt nodded.
“Then shush.” He drew his hand away and Cobalt deliberately pressed his lips together. “Better. Lie down.”
Cobalt settled onto his back again. For a moment he stared at the ceiling while Preston shuffled around. Then he complied without a word as he was divested of his clothing. He lay, naked, arms at his sides, jaw set, gaze resolutely fixed on the swirls etched into the square of glass covering the lightbulbs above the bed.
“So serious.” Preston’s face invaded his field of view, and he adjusted his focus.
“Not serious,” Cobalt objected. “Waiting.”
“With such a grim expression? What, exactly, do you think you’re waiting for?” He ran a finger along Cobalt’s jaw.
The tension there made Cobalt’s teeth ache a bit, and he tried to ease off the hard bite.
“Talk to me,” Preston whispered.
“Stop being so careful. Stop worrying so much.” He wrapped his arms around Preston’s neck and dragged him into a deep kiss, winding his legs up around his waist. Their bare skin slid together, short hairs rasping and sending delicious tremors through Cobalt.
Preston answered with a hard kiss and an arm shoveling under the small of Cobalt’s back. The hug was so strong Cobalt gasped; then he yelped as Preston lifted and tossed him a foot or so closer to the headboard. “You’re going to want to hang on to that.” Preston wagged his head at the cast iron bars and flowers that made up the bed’s ornate frame.
Cobalt lifted both hands over his head, reaching back to grip the cold metal. “Why?”
“You’ll need to brace yourself.” Preston was kneeling between Cobalt’s thighs, and he nudged them apart. “Open up, my Ice Prince.”
Cobalt tried to swallow, but his mouth was too dry. He complied, watching as Preston rolled a condom over his very prominent erection.